Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Throwin a pity party ... ya'll are invited.

**Update** in response, Boo, I brought up a long weekend, but my Mom insisted that "if we're making the trip out, we want to stay all week", which I was fine with ... that conversation happened back before she got sick. After my thought, I emailed my mom, telling her how happy I was that she's feeling good enough to consider traveling again ... and reminded her that the offer to bring them out here still stands. No point in her knowing how I'm feeling about this, as I don't want to damper her mood and excitement. Now, I'm fighting a BIG URGE not to send something hateful to my brother ... I know nothing good would come of that that would be worth the few moments of satisfaction I'd feel ... :)

What started out as a decent day went south earlier ... I'm sure once I put this all down in words, it's going to seem less significant than it feels right now ... here goes.

I've been trying to get my parents (from Kansas) out to Georgia for a visit since I moved here, which was over 3 years ago ... my dad is retired and my mom retired this time last year. Timing was an issue, so several times when it looked like I could get them out here, something always came up that made it impossible. Also, my dad plants a huge garden every summer and it completely occupies his time from mid-May through mid-September ... also, until my mom retired, her job kept them from travling much. Well, once she retired, they agreed that Fall, 2008 would be when they would visit .. we talked about it at length, made pre-plans for how many days, what all we would do, etc ... then she got diagnosed w/ Rheumatoid Arthritis w/ an extreme depression component ... there were days when she couldn't even get out of bed. My dad, consequently got depressed and started drinking more ... well, with lots of med adjustments, she is now on day 10 of "having a great day" .. I am so happy and relieved about this ... looks like she's on the upswing of things and she's so excited. I'd held off mentioning anything about resuming our plans for a trip out, just to make sure that this was for real, and was honestly waiting for them to bring it up.

Called them this morning and she was so excited to tell me something .. asked me if I'd spoken to Ron, my brother, lately .. told her no (which, when I thought about it, was a bit odd). Turns out my brother has offered to fly my parents out to Vegas in May. While I'm glad she feels good enough now to even consider traveling, my feelings are hurt. I've been trying to get my brother out here as well, but he always tells me he travels enough for his job, doesn't wanna do it on his days off, blah blah blah .... yet he sure doesn't mind going to Vegas "on his days off". Granted, Georgia vs Vegas is a no-brainer, but I just feel they are all being inconsiderate of me. Please don't get me wrong, I'm struggling with how I'm feeling right now ... very thankful for her feeling better .. very thankful that my brother is so generous with them to take them somewhere nice ... just feel kinda left out in the wings here.

OK .... I'm pitiful ... just read back what I've written. Plus, Marty just called and I told him and he doesn't really understand why I'm so hurt. Maybe it's hormones ... maybe it's more.

Gonna go shower and do some thinkin ... if anyone wants to tell me what a selfish person I'm being, have at it ... if anyone can empathize or has advice for me, I'm open ...


  1. They obviously don't realize how much it means to you for them to visit. How long of a visit were you planning? Maybe shortening it up a little so they don't feel like they are giving up tons of time (and you may aapreciate the break once their gone too)

    I can totally see why you are hurt though. They sound so excited about the trip out west but complained of a trip east.

  2. I understand where you're coming from. OK, so maybe where you live isn't as exciting as some other places, but still... Some people just don't think though. It's just how people are.

    I'm sorry you're feeling so let down and left out. *Hugs*

  3. I don't see the pity party. I think it was a little inconsiderate not to reschedule previous plans first if she felt better. That being said, is there any way you can fly to vegas and spent time with them out there? That seems like it would be fun.

  4. You monster. How can you even CONSIDER them coming to your place when there's game tables aplenty in Vegas? (aw hell,,you know Im givin' ya the business). Just curious, have you thought about calling them and telling them that you're a little hurt over this and would like to know why Vegas is a go, but Georgia isn't? Dont let it turn into a resentment before you give them opportunity to make amends. They might not even know it hurt your feelers. Either way,,it's a valid reason (in my opinion)to be hurt. I think anyone would be.

  5. you feel what you feel....
    never apologise for that!!!